Christmas is over, and I
(barely) survived. Every year I say that
I am not going to let myself get burnt out from the season, and every year I
end up stumbling around in my jammies until all hours of the day wondering what
the hell just happened.
In addition to some
holiday drama, there were a few things that made this Christmas season
especially challenging.
We sold our home.
The kids have had some
trouble adjusting to all of the newness.
I also started a new job
and created 2 new courses which made me realize that I am no longer a full-time stay-at-home-mom.
Basically, 2013 was all
about transition.
Most of these things are
wonderful opportunities for which we are grateful. But I am not going to lie;
it was a lot of hard work. It wasn’t
like we waved our magic wand, and suddenly we had a new house or a new course
appeared.
We pushed ourselves in a
lot of ways, and I feel proud of what we accomplished, but I am exhausted.
Exhausted.
And in the face of all
this pushing, I can tell you that I was not very nice to myself. I felt a
tremendous amount of guilt as I figured out working part time mostly from
home. I felt responsible for Marie’s
difficult transition.
So as I figure out what
I want to do for resolutions for next year, I have decided to go with a theme
for 2014, which was inspired by The Huffington Post Healthy Living post.
I originally thought
“strength,” but that sounded more fitness orientated. Then I thought “joy,” but I thought that
sounded too generic.
Then, as I was folding
laundry after going grocery shopping and managing the kids with their screen
time, I was struck with this thought: I need to be more kind to myself.
Maybe that looks like
sleeping in instead of going for that run.
Maybe that looks like
going for that run instead of chilling in front of the TV.
Maybe that looks like
cooking a really delicious meal or maybe it is getting take out.
Being creative makes me
happy so I think I will finally devote some time to learn how to make iMovies
and do that BritCo Skill Share workshop that I signed up for in December.
Being kind to myself
requires me to be present and really listen to what I need rather than what I
think I can push myself to do. And that,
in and of itself, is a challenge for me.
I feel that our family
has been through a lot of changes, and we could all benefit from a focus on
kindness.
Yes, kindness is my
theme for 2014.
What are your goals for
2014? Do you have a theme? Or are you more of a resolution person?
2 comments:
I picked a word to live by for the new year. I picked "self-esteem". I'm going to work on thinking better of myself and being not quite so quick to put myself down or think my needs don't matter. Basically, I'm tired of being invisible.
Happy New Year!
Aunt Diane
So proud of you!!
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