BlogHer13 Insight

Last year, when I returned from BlogHer, I lamented that I will not be going next year.  I felt burned out from the pace and energy of the conference.  I also didn’t know how it would work with moving.  Pretty early on, I made peace with the fact that I would not be attending the conference.

But then a strange turn of events occurred, and I ended up going with my friend, Emily, who knew of an early bird ticket for sale.  I was living at my parents’ house without a solid date for moving in to our new house. I didn’t know how it was all going to work out, but I took a leap of faith and just said yes.

At the Voices of the Year with Emily

I am so incredibly glad that I did. 

Before I left, I wrote about what I hoped to achieve at BlogHer.  I didn’t think of it as writing a wish list to the universe, but unbeknownst to me, the universe was listening.

I learned a lot of useful information about marketing and blogging.  But beyond that, I had a chance to really talk and connect with others.  Not just idle chit chat expected at a conference.  I had the kind of discussions that left me energized and focused and inspired.  Lately, I had been feeling dull; all of my energy has been funneling towards teaching and that, in and of itself, has made me feel insecure and unsure how to proceed as a mother and a blogger. I found clarity and a little more confidence in my choices . . .. thanks to the women that just happened to be sitting at my table. 

Loved these ladies from the Lean In Circle

Which is way more than I bargained for when I flippantly agreed to go to a conference I swore I wasn’t going to attend.

Oh, and this happened, too:

I met Sheryl Sandberg!

Can you believe that?!  I met Sheryl Sandberg.  You know, Sheryl who wrote Lean In.  I didn’t get a chance to tell how her book made me all teary-eyed as I am tiptoeing my way back into the work world.  I didn’t get a chance to tell her how her how relieved I was to read that boundaries do not hold you back in a career, they give you more focus on your personal definition of success.

However, when she came over to introduce herself, and I said, “Nice to meet you.  My name is Erin,” that somehow all that was conveyed in those two sentences.

I also had a chance to catch up with a great friend.  It is totally unfair that there is a whole continent getting in the way of us meeting for drinks and chatting like that all the time.  (Note: Annie, you were greatly missed).

Me with Elizabeth from Flourish in Progress

If I had to choose one word to describe my experience at BlogHer, it would be serendipitous.  And for that, I am grateful that I just listened to my instincts to just go.

Have you ever said yes to something without overthinking it and it turned out to be exactly what you needed?

 

10th Anniversary

This day, 10 years go, I was getting ready to go to our wedding.

Which means I have been married for 10 years.

10 years?!

Which would mean I would have known Harrington for 14 years.

Mind. Blown.

Our lives look nothing like they did 10 years ago.  A lot has happened.  New jobs.  New kids.  New home.  Our life has evolved.  And each change presented it’s own set of challenges and speed bumps.

Ten years ago when I married Harrington, I knew I wanted kids and a house to grow into.  But I often wonder, at the tender age of 25, how the hell did I know this was going to work.

The short answer is I didn’t.

The long answer is I knew we loved each other, and at the time, that was good enough.  As our lives unfolded, that love was the foundation for support – I supported his choices; choices in new jobs, choices for networking opportunities that took him away from the family, choices to recharge such as hockey.  And he supported mine; to be a full-time SAHM, going to the gym, blogging, and a brief, yet intense scrapbooking phase.

That support built a layer of respect for each other and our unique roles in our family.

Now my role is changing a bit since I am no longer a full-time stay-at-home-mom.  Sometimes I doubt this choice, as if I broke my promise to Harrington and if I am being honest, broke a promise to myself.

When I start to become overcome with guilt or confusion, he encourages me.  His cheerleading efforts range anywhere from making sure I’m well hydrated by brining we water as I slave over grading assignments to emptying the dishwasher to taking his shift with the kids.

 In those moments I realize how this whole marriage thing works for us.  We are a team.  And he wants me to be me.

Creating a space for each of us to evolve as we grow older – that is the truest love of all.

Like I said, each stage brought it’s own set of issues.  In the beginning of our marriage, to say that I *may* have had some trouble with compromise would be an understatement.  Bringing kids into the picture, although incredibly awesome, was not easy, either.

But now that we made it through some hard stuff (harder than they early fights of what brand fish sticks to buy and what grocery store to go to), I feel more confident in us as a couple.  Do I think we will not endure any more difficult encounters?  Absolutely not.  However, I do feel more confident in our ability hold tight during those bumps in the road rather than pulling off to the side and asking to get out of the car.

Yesterday, my parents brought us cake and a bottle of wine for our anniversary.  My mom said, “This is just the beginning,” as my dad nodded in agreement.

I totally believe this to be true.  And I can’t wait to see where the next ten years takes us.

Happy Anniversary, Harrington.

I love you.

 

10 years ago . . .