Friday, August 2, 2013

10th Anniversary



This day, 10 years go, I was getting ready to go to our wedding.

Which means I have been married for 10 years.

10 years?!

Which would mean I would have known Harrington for 14 years.

Mind. Blown.

Our lives look nothing like they did 10 years ago.  A lot has happened.  New jobs.  New kids.  New home.  Our life has evolved.  And each change presented it’s own set of challenges and speed bumps.


Ten years ago when I married Harrington, I knew I wanted kids and a house to grow into.  But I often wonder, at the tender age of 25, how the hell did I know this was going to work.

The short answer is I didn’t.

The long answer is I knew we loved each other, and at the time, that was good enough.  As our lives unfolded, that love was the foundation for support – I supported his choices; choices in new jobs, choices for networking opportunities that took him away from the family, choices to recharge such as hockey.  And he supported mine; to be a full-time SAHM, going to the gym, blogging, and a brief, yet intense scrapbooking phase.

That support built a layer of respect for each other and our unique roles in our family.

Now my role is changing a bit since I am no longer a full-time stay-at-home-mom.  Sometimes I doubt this choice, as if I broke my promise to Harrington and if I am being honest, broke a promise to myself.

When I start to become overcome with guilt or confusion, he encourages me.  His cheerleading efforts range anywhere from making sure I’m well hydrated by brining we water as I slave over grading assignments to emptying the dishwasher to taking his shift with the kids.

 In those moments I realize how this whole marriage thing works for us.  We are a team.  And he wants me to be me.

Creating a space for each of us to evolve as we grow older – that is the truest love of all.

Like I said, each stage brought it’s own set of issues.  In the beginning of our marriage, to say that I *may* have had some trouble with compromise would be an understatement.  Bringing kids into the picture, although incredibly awesome, was not easy, either.

But now that we made it through some hard stuff (harder than they early fights of what brand fish sticks to buy and what grocery store to go to), I feel more confident in us as a couple.  Do I think we will not endure any more difficult encounters?  Absolutely not.  However, I do feel more confident in our ability hold tight during those bumps in the road rather than pulling off to the side and asking to get out of the car.

Yesterday, my parents brought us cake and a bottle of wine for our anniversary.  My mom said, “This is just the beginning,” as my dad nodded in agreement.

I totally believe this to be true.  And I can’t wait to see where the next ten years takes us.

Happy Anniversary, Harrington.

I love you.

 
10 years ago . . .




Thursday, July 25, 2013

What I Hope to Gain at BlogHer


Today, I make my yearly sojourn to BlogHer

I didn't think I would be able to make it, you know, with moving and starting a new job and then adding additional responsibilities said job.

But I am.

And I filled with the anticipated mash up of emotions of excitement/freedom/guilt.

Maybe a touch more guilt bc Thomas had a difficult understanding that I need a bit if time each day to do my work. Lacking language to adequately express himself, he acts out. And this week, I wasn't feel centered enough to handle it in the best way. So to spare you the painful details (or myself from reliving some pretty low parenting points), I will just say that there were some strong power struggles in which poor Marie became caught in the crossfire. This resulted in a trip to the Dairy Queen for some ice cream therapy.




But I digress

Going to BlogHer feels different this year. I have such a clearer vision of what I hope to gain.
I, of course, am looking to learn how to build this little ol' blog of mine and share the newest social media information with my students. But I am also looking to get some badly needed inspiration from the breakfast keynote speaker, Sheryl Sandburg of Lean In. There have been more than a few times in recent weeks where I thought the benefits of me working super part time dis not outweigh the guilt of putting boundaries around my time or the stress of managing summer time schedules.
But there is a part of me that knows how much I need this. 

I am blazing a new trail for myself, one that is lacking in role models. I am hoping to find some words of wisdom that will help me during these confusing times.


Are you attempting something new? Are you a trailblazer? Who is your inspiration? What words of wisdom do you have to offer?