Tuesday, October 18, 2011

My Unbirthday Post

I love birthdays. I especially love my birthday. I love hanging out with my family. I love cake and ice cream. And I love opening presents. I also love the feeling that I have another whole year of learning behind me that I hope has made me a bit wiser.



This birthday was not the best birthday I have ever had. In fact, I can’t remember feeling worse on any other birthday. Ever.



It’s nothing that anyone did or did not do. In fact, I had tons of Facebook wishes. I was surrounded by good company. I checked out the new model home of my favorite builder. I drank champagne and had my mom’s cassata cake.



And a giant pain in my side.



I haven’t really talked about it too much here, but I have been going to physical therapy for over two months now. I have had this strange tingling in my feet, and after a lot of super sleuthing, it is due to a weak core and overcompensating back muscles. My physical therapist told me no Zumba and no yoga.



In the beginning I had a positive attitude. When someone says take a few weeks off from exercise, it’s not the worst thing . . . until I started to feel the mental effects of not exercising.



I feel that I get sad more often. I feel grumpier. And I feel pudgy. *sigh*



I was excited that I finally cracked the code on the combo that makes me feel balanced.



I was starting to feel hopeful because I had recently reincorporated yoga and more challenging exercises into my fitness/physical therapy routine. I had set a date to go back to Zumba at the end of the month.



Now, with this crazy pain in my side, I feel derailed. Despondent. Depressed.



Yesterday, instead of reveling in my birthday, I had to go to the doctor and get an ultrasound to determine if some internal organ is the offender of this major pain. And as a side note, I have done that whole drink-40-ounces-of-water-ultrasound test at least three times and never had I had the feeling that I was going to throw up while my back was cramping up. (The tech said I drank too much water, and my kidneys were in overload. Nice). Tomorrow I go to physical therapy to see what my therapist says.



I just want to be able to take care of me, my kids, and my daily business.



Enough already.



I am grumpy. Well, if I am being honest, it’s more like angry. And frustrated. Not to mention *outraged* that this happened on the one day I feel totally awesome celebrating me.



I am going to demand a redo. I hope my Mom is up to making that cake again.



How do you deal with personal setbacks?

7 comments:

New York Mama said...

You sure do deserve a redo!!!

Elizabeth-FlourishinProgress said...

Oh mama, I AM SO SO Sorry you had to deal with this on your birthday or any other day for that matter. I hope they figure things out quickly and you return to your pain-free and fabulous self pronto. And then I think you deserve the hugest if redos. =) xoxo.

Elizabeth-FlourishinProgress said...

oooops....i meant "of" not "if"

RealMommyChron said...

So sorry you are going through this! I feel like everyone is having such a rough Fall one way or another! :( Not cool.

I hope it gets figured out soon and then you get that redo!!!!

xoxox

Erin Janda Rawlings said...

Thanks, New York Mama!

Erin Janda Rawlings said...

thanks, Elizabeth! Hope you feelbetter soon, too!

Erin Janda Rawlings said...

RealMommyChronicles, not cool. Not cool at all. Our holiday season better be easy breezy!