I have felt exhausted. I blame birthday season. What the numbers didn’t show was the mental toll it took on me, seeing as I downplayed all the drama. I just feel there was a lot of emotion attached to each event. Not to mention that Harrington was gone for a lot of the season.
I was feeling like I was *waiting* to see what everyone else’s schedule was so maybe, just maybe I could *squeeze* a little, itty bit of me time in. And sometimes that me time was an eye appointment.
And to make sure that I was getting everything done, I fell out of balance. I was drinking copious amounts of coffee and looking a bit too forward to wine at the end of the day. Everything got done, but it was at the expense of my health. I was having a hard time sleeping, and my stomach was always in knots. So I guess a lesson I learned with all this is this:
Just because I can, doesn’t mean I should.
Sure, I can plan a ton of events and do all the cleaning and do all the running around and do all the cooking and do all the cleaning and do all the laundry (and did I mention cleaning, because I feel that I went through gallons and gallons of Windex, bathroom cleaner, and dust spray). But in the end, I felt like I was hanging on by my fingernails. And I feel like I just need to respect the face that I am hardwired for stress and have a hard time decompressing.
To be honest, I didn’t realize how much of a toll this took on me until after a few weeks of not having to get emotionally ready for a party, just how light I felt. The Babes and I were outside enjoying the sunshine while I was planting our garden (another post, because this year, I went all out), and I felt much more relaxed. It was like I had more mental real estate space available to enjoy the moment instead of worrying about the next.
I realized that I had not been enjoying The Babes. I also did not have the energy to do the things that I enjoy. Gym time and yoga weren’t happening. I was disappointed by the quality of my posts. And I was resenting being last on the list while I squared everyone else away, hoping that there was a scrap of time for me.
I need to find my groove again and restore balance to my life.
(Also, I know I was away from blogging for too long when Skinny Scoop sent me an email wondering where I was).
So I thought this would be a great time to create a survey. How do you recharge your batteries? Clearly, what I was doing was not working. So please, take a second to answer the survey. I plan on writing a follow up post on this.
I am glad to be able to spend more time writing and connecting with you. Have a wonderful weekend, everyone!