Signs I May Need a Break: Spring Edition

My friend Angela, from Jumping with Your Fingers Crossed, recently vlogged about how May is the new December.

Preach on, Angela. 

I won’t bore you with the details of this week alone, but it has been the kind of week where I have been drinking coffee with reckless abandon.  

Afternoon coffee: #cantstop #wontstop

That new rule I was trying to institute about no more afternoon coffee?  Bwhahaha!  

I was so focused on making sure we made it to all of our activities that I didn’t even realize I was crabby.  I mean these were fun! exciting! activities!  How could I feel tired?

Fun at the History Walk Field Trip

Fun class activity.  And by fun, I mean I could hammer a nail in straight by the time it took
my 5 year old to put the whole thing together.

Fun at Open House Ice Cream Social (ours Flat Stanley went to New York)!

Fun with volunteering at Thomas's school again! This time I got to see
the firefighter show us around her truck, which was kinda cool since Thomas has
always wanted to be a firefighter.

Fun, right?!  It was, but the pace was in.tense.  It wasn’t until I had to make an extra trip to the library to pay an exuberant amount of fines when I saw kids walking to the hall for prom that I noticed it.

In the midst of fancy dresses and a haze of Axe Body spray, I was overcome with envy.  These young people were going out for (what seemed to me) a carefree evening of dinner and dancing (and probably drinking) while I was schlepping it to the library and then to Kroger to get organic celery for tomorrow’s lunch.

That envy shone a light on some feelings I wasn’t paying attention to at all.  Here is a list that indicated that I am in desperate need of a break:

I was sitting in my car at a stoplight when I heard a loud, irritating popping noise over my jams.  The lady in the car next to me was popping her gum.  My only feasible solution was to punch her in the throat like Melissa McCarthy in Identity Theft.  But I don’t have time to go to jail, so I clenched my jaw and seethed.  

My new Me Time is the 45 minutes I sit on uncomfortable bleachers while the smell of chlorine burns my nose during Marie’s swim practice.

 I savor the 1 minute 47 seconds it takes me to get the mail after I pick up Marie with Thomas from the bus stop.  That is 1 minute and 47 seconds that I am alone and am not subjected to their bickering, which commences immediately when they get into the house. 

On Tuesday, I became full of rage when painting my nails did not turn out the way I wanted due to the cheap nail polish I bought.  That rage was magnified due to the fact I was unable to find time to travel the 3 miles to Ulta to get the nail polish I needed. 

Watching TV at night seems too hard.  I am going to say that again: watching TV at night seems too hard.  That means sitting on my couch, keeping my eyes open, and following a plot is too difficult – which is unacceptable. 

Drinking water seems too time consuming.  This week it felt like filling up a glass of water and drinking it take up too much time, time that could be spent on doing much more important things that can’t get done since I was not home all week like laundry or cleaning the kitty litter box.

I think I am going to require some alone time this weekend, perhaps with a glass of wine.  I also think I am going to need a meal that does not consist of a.) An argument convincing Thomas why eating protein is important and b.) Me shoving the “meal” that I hastily prepared down my throat so I can clean up before we go to swim.

Is your May crazy? How are you handling it? 

Movies I Want to See, but Probably Won't

Yesterday, I was on Live in the D. I made it there despite the icy roads and killer sinus headache that totally answered the question, "What would an ice pick feel like if it was repeatedly jammed into my left temple?" Harrington, I am forever grateful that you drove me to the studio. Mom, you stayed with the kids who have been cooped up for days and started to act like caged animals - thank you from the bottom of my heart.

One of the main topics: Is it appropriate to bring infants to an R-rated movie? I said no, of course. But in a deep, dark moment during Christmas break/Snowpocalypse, I did casually flirt with the idea.

I have seen just about every kids movie since Princess and the Frog graced the big screen in 2009. And yes, I'm totally counting Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs 2 even though I slept through most of it. (Dark room in the upgraded, cozy seats with no one asking me for anything? Seemed like the natural thing to do).

But I have a deep longing to see a movie that is neither animated nor has a talking animal as the protagonist.

I weighed my personal enjoyment of seeing a movie I want to see against the inevitable psychological damage to their gently psyche if we were to see an R rated movie (answer: probably less with Catching Fire and possibly more with Wolf of Wall Street although I can guarantee they have probably heard the F word at some time, especially during this E X T E N D E D break).

But alas, I am a full-fledged adult and realize this is a horrible idea, mostly because I prefer to use the money I would need for their counseling towards their post high school education.

So here is a list of movies I WANT to see now, but will probably watch On Demand in 1-hour increments after the kids go to bed:

Anchorman 2 - We speak the dialogue from Anchorman like a second language around here.  (“I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly”).  (“I’m kind of a big deal.”)  I will never stop loving Will Ferrell.

 Wolf of Wall Street - I am intrigued by this movie, although I know little about it.  My key point of interest is Leonardo DiCaprio.  Also, they say the F word a lot.

American Hustle: - I love the 70’s vibe with it, and it reminds me of the days when I could see movies like Casino and Good Fellas whenever I wanted.  Plus, I’ll see anything with Jennifer Lawrence and Bradley Cooper.  Now that I think of it, I think Silver Linings Playbook was the last movie I saw in the theater.

Catching Fire - I read the books and saw Hunger Games. I am compelled to see it. Also, Jennifer Lawrence.

So do you bring kids to R rated movies?  What is the last movie you saw in the theater? What do you really want to see now?